Where Would We Be Now
by Azerbuzzin
Summary: “If only love had found us first, everything would have been different, Kyle. I just know things would’ve been easier… I’m so sorry; Wendy’s just so… difficult…” STYLE.


Stan and I were walking down Stark's Pond that afternoon, just bonding, and making up for the time lost when Stan was on dates with his girlfriend of five years, on and off, Wendy Testaburger. I must admit though, during all those years, Stan and I started to feel different towards each other, and coincidently, at the age of twenty-one we both managed to admit it at the same time. Of course, Wendy knows nothing of how we both felt; it was just difficult for Stan to break it off with her. I understood, and I was willing to sacrifice and wait for him.

---

There he was, trying to tell me a joke that I really couldn't get into my thick head. After he told me the joke though, I just smiled at him. He knew I didn't get it, so he started to laugh, but not the insulting or annoying kind of laugh, he was laughing a warm laugh.

At that very moment, I wanted to embrace him; I felt that I _needed_ to hold him really close to me. But I couldn't, and I felt my heart cripple at the restriction, so I turned away, which probably caught his attention, since he suddenly stopped laughing.

The very moment I sighed, he was right beside me asking me "Why?"

I looked at him, trying my best not to show how sad I really felt. I didn't know how to relate my feeling of distress to him, because I never encouraged Stan to cheat on anyone he's with, yes, I'm a really good person, save for the many _justifying_ thing's I have done to Cartman for the past years.

"It's okay, I'm just feeling down." I smile at him, hoping he'd believe.

I didn't expect him to do anything, but I was expecting a reply. Instead, Stan slipped his hand into mine and silently invited me to walk with him. I was glad that the only people who were in Stark's Pond were the people who wouldn't give a crap about us, since we absolutely didn't know them. And if someone we knew happened to pass by, I just hoped they'd think its fine for us to hold hands since everyone _did_ practically know were best friends, well Super Best Friends, and it was as natural as the sun rising and setting in. Stan then led me to one of the docks near the pond where we used to play when we were kids, and there we both sat down, looking straight ahead into the further parts of the waters.

"It's spring."

I looked at him curiously.

"Yeah, it is. What about it?"

"Well, it's been a year since we confided." He looked solemn, and apologetic.

"Stan, I—"

He stopped me midway by putting his hand on top of mine, slowly chafing my hands with such care; gradually becoming agonizing because of the facial expression his visage was holding.

"If only love had found us first, everything would have been different, Kyle. I just know things would've been easier… I'm so sorry; Wendy's just so… difficult…"

_If only love had found us first._

_Where would we be now?_

I stood up, and looked straight ahead of me. I just couldn't take looking at Stan anymore, watching, listening to him and all his apologies. That's just too much. But then, I have to linger. I want to, no, I need to wait. If I wait, the time will come, that I'd be able to show Stan, everything I feel, but for now, I should just wait. There's no point in rushing things, because it'll all be fruitless.

Stan looks at me worried, thinking he had said something I didn't like. So I decided to assure him that I'm fine by giving him the best smile I could make for this situation. He smiled back. We spent the next 20 minutes just feeling awkward, and I had a thousand possibly kind and reassuring words to tell him, but I don't think it would help with all the tension building up. So I decided that maybe, he would break the uncomfortable silence for me.

He stood up and faced me for the 2nd time that day, confronting me with the same familiar words all over again. "Kyle, I'm so sorry."

This time though, I put my right hand on his shoulder and pull him into a hug, which probably and hopefully surprised him. And I whispered those simple words.

"I'll wait."

I can't explain how relieved Stan looked, but I knew it was overwhelming, because I could see it in his eyes when we both pulled away from the hug. And since he was happy, I determined that I was glad too.

"Kyle, I promise you, it won't be too long."

After the last of our little talk, it was almost nightfall, so I suggested that we both went home already. On our way home, he tried to explain to me the joke he was trying to crack on me this morning, so I listened intently. After the whole explaining thing, I got the damned thing and started to laugh, and I saw how pleased he was that I finally got it. So I smiled back at him, letting him mirror my expression as we both walked to our respective houses, knowing that we'd see each other again. As I reached the front door of my house, I couldn't help but wonder, if Stan and I had found these feelings before Wendy even came thrashing in, where would we be now?

* * *

This short fic is based on the song

Where Would We Be Now by Good Charlotte.

Its also a continuation of my fail

comic on dA.

~Azreto/Bevs G.


End file.
